Our Walk

We are horrible bloggers aren't we?

Yes we know the last entry being Oct 2009!! Terrible! Okay will attempt to make regular updates...Here's a short one:

Lately we have been finding the walk with our Lord really challenging. Sigh..
Stay tuned for more details...

Life and the Element

Long overdue update on our lives.

Angel and I are cruising along, and despite some hiccups here and there, we are, for the most part managing well (I hope). I suppose it is all thanks to God for providing us with just what we needed, just at the right time.

A big influence on our lives recently has been this book by Ken Robinson. The title is "The Element - How finding your passion changes everything." Some of you might remember Mr Robinson from his TED talk on creativity in schools and the education system in general. The book is an expanded version of the speech he gave for TED.

I strongly suggest you at least listen to the talk here, especially if you are an educator in any capacity. Especially relevant since the lecture title is" Do Schools Kill Creativity?"

A Tribute to Slimey

This was in our draft since eons ago.. but here it is:

Not too long ago, Matt found a snail in his house garden.

If you don't already know, Matt loves animals.. but especially the reptilian, amphibian, insect looking type. He once contemplated on stopping the car at the expressway just so he can carry a turtle who was on the expressway to a safe place away from the traffic. Nevermind his own safey eh?

What made the snail, (which we affectionately named "Slimey") really outstanding was that he was recognisable. He had a little chip in his shell at the top, which said he had been through something. If anything it gave him a bit of character. Night after night he would come back to the EXACT SAME spot to have his dinner. The mystery as to where he went during the day was soon solved as Matt found out he Slimey had been retiring to a well hidden little spot inside an unused flower pot (affectionately named "Slimey's hovel"). Very clever indeed.

Soon Slimely became a part of our lives and our conversation each night would begin with, "Did you see Slimey today? What was he/she doing? (Snails are both male and female)" On nights when Slimely didn't show up, we would get really anxious and think of the worse but sure enough he would show up the next day.

As we observed Slimely more and more, we began to appreciate how happy he was just doing the same routine day after day. How he took the time to enjoy his meals, his slooooowwww walks, his nap time and just life in general. During this time when we discovered Slimely, we were going through so much changes in life and so had so much to do and worry about. But the thought of how God took care of him day after day was reassuring. Even more so, he was thriving and I bet he didn't worry. God took care of Slimey's every need and Slimey glorified God by being what he was created to be. What more us?

Slimey passed on.. won't go into the details. We miss him/her very much but we are thankful for God opening our eyes to the lesson of providence. Next time don't just take time to smell the roses, take time to observe a snail =)

Love

Much to say but first things first.

Life is really short. Its fleeting and all too sudden.

So love, like you've never been hurt
Laugh like there's no tomorrow
Live with passion, as if it were your job

Kiss like it were the last
Dance as if no one is looking
Sing as if your life were the music and you are the lyrics

Forgive before the sunsets
Rest deeply and not be fretful
Aim to see the world around you with new eyes each day

Kidnapped by Aliens

Well. Here I am. The other half of Angel, and I'm here to tell you I've just escaped from my captors.

The first thing I did was to change the blog back to the friendly brown that it was originally before I got all 'zen' on it.

Well of course I haven't been kidnapped by bipedal diminutive green aliens with big eyes, however I have been extremely busy courtesy of my new job - essentially I have left the corporate world and all its regular 9-5 hours to embark on a career as a professional entertainer cum freelance designer. Right now I hardly get to spend proper quality time with Angel, and my work schedule resembles the output of a pseudorandom number generator.

The only upside is that I'm earning about 40% more than my previous company. Looking at the sacrifices/arguements Angel & I have been through since I started this crazy venture, the pay increase suddenly seems very small indeed.

On the flipside, Angel has started to play the keyboard for CSC's friday 'Growth' sessions. Today was her first time. I'm so, so proud of her. She's so brave. And she's already better than me when I first started.

I'll end my post here - I've a logo design to rush out, and the little green aliens are coming to get me soon. I'll write again as soon as they release me.

Just breathe

Qn: When do you know you've overworked?

An: When you have a migraine.

Yes an accumulation of all the triggers this week finally crossed the threshold. I thought I was doing well so could afford to push the line a bit more. But nope. My body was screaming.. ouch. It all happened in vocal class the vision started to go etc.. sigh.. so embarassing.

I'm better now but I so need to decompress. Have been working too hard. Not taking care of myself again. Been letting myself go and not treating myself right. All the late nights, the anxiety over work and over life has just taken its toil. After the bad migraine last year, I went on a meditation exercise and really made the conscious effort to slow down. Its work beautifully until recently I totally forgot about that. Note to self = I am not a duracell bunny.

I need to relook and slow down. I am no good to anyone when I'm sick or weak. I need to take care of myself before I can take care of others.

I'm going to be kind to myself and love myself.

The Rich Young Man - Mark 10:20-21

" 'Master, I have kept all these since my earliest days.' Jesus looked steadily at him and he was filled with love for him, and he said, 'You need to do one thing more. Go and sell what you own and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; then come follow me.'"

What must have it been like to have Jesus look at you in such a way. I can only imagine. What must have it been like to have those eyes look deep into your soul. A look filled with love and not judgement as one might have expected. Even a young man such as him who lived according to the laws had a fault, a weakness, a blemish, a bondage, a sin, a problem was not judged. How incredible is that?

I imagine that this young man had unwaveringly kept his eyes on our dear Lord while our Lord looked at him. He knew he was clean and he wanted to do more, more to please his God. I ask myself if I would be able to hold my gaze steady as Jesus looks at me. I hardly think so. I know He will look at me with love but it would have been to me a piercing stare which I cannot bare to encounter because I'm just such a broken piece of work. Not just a fault, a weakness, a blemish, a bondage, a sin a problem, but many. Even I don't want to look at myself for who I am. I would cover my face in my hands. Even that would somehow not be enough.

But deep within my heart, I still long for that steady look filled with love. I want to experience the moment when I see the infinite love my God has for me face to face. I want to be able to see that love.

I don't want to know about his love from the bible, etc, I don't want to "see" his love in my life through the people around me or through those who love me. Just but once I want to see his love for me through his eyes. I want to be able to look back unwaveringly under his gaze and say I've run the good race and its good to be home. Oh what a prize that would be.

Until then, I'm comforted that the first response of my Lord is not judgement but love. As the young man placed himself under your gaze. So too do I want to put myself there, that you might find what is lacking in me and give me the grace to accept and desire to love more.

I feel so small.